Are you really listening?

Executive Coaches like myself often take pride on coming up with a great question that really touches on a crucial aspect of an issue that our client is presenting to us.  Moreover, we strive to engage in a coaching conversation, using questions as our tools, to get to the heart of the issue that the client is not presenting to us or even hiding from themselves.  What may be overlooked in this regard is that the ability to intently, actively and consciously listen to what our client is saying is critically important to knowing when to ask the right question.  Only by intense listening can we be of true service to our clients and help them discover, develop and own their personal action plan.

There are similar lessons for leadership in this coach-approach to interacting with and building your teams and in getting the best results for your organization.  In today's cacophonous and demanding environment leaders can easily lose the power of effective listening.  We are constantly being bombarded by "noise" from all angles and even in our off-time we seldom disconnect from our business - checking e-mails, answering calls, and just trying to catch up with our just "finished" work day while we get ready for the sprint tomorrow.  Sure, we might make the pretense of listening to the feedback and input of others but how often have we caught ourselves multitasking while one of our peers or subordinates is speaking to us?  How often do you catch yourself scanning your e-mail or sending a text message while on the phone?  What did you really take away from that conversation?

As leaders we are impatient for action.  We feel the need to be decisive.  We rarely take the time to pause, focus and reflect.  And that often means we have little or no time to listen for critical facts or observations coming to us from the skilled staff we have surrounded ourselves with.  We have lost the ability to discern what's important from the multitude of inputs coming at us.

Our own survival mechanisms also do us no favors.  Sometimes, in order to maintain the pace we have set for ourselves we subconsciously establish an array of filters that are intended to make us more "efficient" but actually compromise our ability to see the "forest for the trees".  So before we have had the chance to evaluate information coming our way our mind has already reacted instinctually, discounted the new data on the basis of the individual speaking (e.g. that staff member is too low on the totem pole to have relevant information), context (e.g., "they" don't know enough about our business to comment), or something as simple as timing confounds us (e.g., our minds are focused on another problem that seems more pressing at the time).

Organizations are similarly at risk of omissions in listening.  We engage in strategic planning exercises, employee engagement surveys, stakeholder focus groups, and opinion polls but sometimes structure the questions or processes to get the answers we want.  More astounding is that we sometimes lack the discipline to truly hear what our constituents are telling us even when it comes out in black and white.  We can easily hear what we want to hear and look for input that reinforces our existing biases.

So at an individual leadership level how can you overcome this bias against effective listening?  Here are some suggestions:

• Disconnect from work/technology with a conscious intent.  Each of us needs some down time or reflective time.   We all need time to truly catch our breath, dedicated time to assess demands on our time, and clearly establish priorities in our business day.  It takes a huge amount of personal discipline to not just jump back on the treadmill at the crack of dawn every day.
• Find your personal way to gain or conserve energy.  You will simply not be an effective listener if you are not rested and/or energized.  Each of us will have a different way of capturing this energy from getting one more hours of sleep, to sticking to a fitness schedule, to keeping up with a personal hobby or interest.  Give your body and mind a rest or a change of pace.
• Step back and truly focus on the person in front of you.  Don't show up at a meeting or invite someone to talk to you without the conscious intent of actually listening.  Take at least five minutes to actually prepare yourself for your next meeting or conversation.  Put your last call, meeting, e-mail, whatever out of your mind before moving on to the next session.
• Show up with a curious and humble mind.  Be prepared to ask questions.  You DON'T have all the answers.  If you did you'd be running the show all on your own.  If you are running an organization of any size there are far more things going on then you have eyes or ears to keep abreast of.  Respect the insight, experience and capacity of those you work with.
• Don't interrupt.  Hold yourself back from having to have the answer.  Resist the temptation to formulate a response, rationalize a strategy, or otherwise be the expert.  Yes you are a leader and you may have come to expect that you should be decisive, but you should even more so consider yourself a facilitator with a mandate of pulling out every piece of information you can from all around you.  

Listening - effective listening - may seem like a lost art and perhaps it is.  But it's an essential leadership skill in this complex and ever changing world of ours that will likely require every ounce of discipline you have.  To listen is to lead and listening will set you apart as a leader.

  ______________________________

Greg Hadubiak, MHSA, FACHE, CEC, PCC
TEC Canada Chair/Executive Coach/Senior Consultant
hadubiak@wmc.ca

Helping leaders realize their strengths and enabling organizations to achieve their potential through the application of my leadership experience and coaching skills. I act as a point of leverage for my clients. I AM their Force Multiplier.

One small step for man...many lessons in success

Time to get my geek on again.  For those of you who have read my blog for a while you'll have noted some references to Star Trek and Captain Picard.  Well those references only belie a much broader interest in astronomy and space exploration.  So it's with more than passing interest that I'm thinking about this coming Sunday, July 20, which marks the 45th anniversary of the first manned landing on the moon.  At the time I was only three and a half years old but yet I remember sitting in front of the TV with my parents, looking at the grainy pictures from a world away, and setting off a fascination with space that has lasted to this day.

Obviously this was a great achievement in human history.  What we may tend to forget, particularly as we get more distant from the event, was that this success was never assured nor was it achieved without great effort and sacrifice.  I believe that the success of the US space program in the 60's and 70's has a lot to teach us about achieving success in our business ventures today.

First, it is informative to remember that the genesis of the mission to land humans on the moon in many ways came out of a singular defeat suffered by the US in the late 50's - the successful launch by Communist Russia of a satellite (Sputnik) into Earth orbit in 1957.  This defeat - coupled with the fear of being outpaced by the rival Soviets - was compounded by other "firsts" of the Soviet space program, most notably getting the first man into space in 1961.  This "defeat" spurred on US efforts to get back in to the space race, redouble its efforts and ultimately establish a vision to inspire and guide their space program in the 1960's.  

“I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal,
before this decade is out, of landing a man on the moon
and returning him safely to the earth.”

President John F. Kennedy

What followed was a series of smaller steps before the ultimate success of Apollo 11.  From 1959 to 1963, six one-man flights of the Mercury program started the American manned space program.  This was followed by ten two-man flights of the Gemini program concluding in 1966.  The US took a series of small steps, increasing in complexity from the first Mercury flight through to the end of Gemini to set the stage for the Apollo missions.  Yet, despite all that had been learned over 16 previous efforts and years of work, the first Apollo mission ended in the tragic deaths of the entire Apollo 1 crew during a pre-launch test.  Lessons had been learned, the vision was compelling, smaller successes had been enjoyed, but trials and tribulations still had to be overcome.

Four manned Apollo mission preceded Apollo 11.  Again each of these missions kept moving the needle forward until such time as all was believed to be in order to attempt a landing - and departure - from the Moon.  Even at this late stage preparations were made for failure.  Then President Richard Nixon was provided with the text of a contingency speech, one that Nixon would read if tragedy struck and Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were left stranded on the lunar surface forever.

 Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore in peace will stay 

on the moon to rest in peace.  These brave men, Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin, know that there is no hope for their recovery.  But they also know that there is hope for mankind 

in their sacrifice...

And there was a reasonable expectation of failure or at least no guarantee of success.  The risks were understood and at all levels of the effort - from the President down to the individual astronauts - there was a tolerance for that risk based on the compelling vision and the rewards expected for success.  

Ultimately, even with the singular success of Apollo 11 and a bit of complacency that comes with such a triumph, fate intervened to let us know that success is never assured or final.  In the case of manned space flight we were reminded of that relatively quickly with the near fatal accident of Apollo 13 and since with tragedies that have befallen the Space Shuttle program.

So what parallels in the success of Apollo 11 are to be seen in looking at what it takes to succeed in our more terrestrial ventures?  Here's what I believe we can learn from this 45th anniversary of Apollo 11:

1. We can be motivated by defeats and even fear to set out on a path to success. 
2. Don't underestimate the power of a compelling vision that stretches what you think is possible.
3. Don't discount the small steps along the way that are necessary to achieve something truly great.  
4. Reaching the pinnacle of achievement doesn't happen overnight nor without significant effort.  
5. Plan for the best but prepare for the worst.  
6. Success is never assured and it is more than likely that we will experience trials, challenges and adversity before we achieve our ultimate goal.  
7. There is risk to be managed - and tolerated - in achieving something truly great.  Nothing risked, nothing gained.  
8. Just as the Apollo program led to significant advancements in avionics, telecommunications, and computers, be open to other opportunities along your path.
9. Never become complacent.  Just when we think we are on top of the world or have our plans and processes aced, something comes along to remind us of the need for humility, diligence and what it took to get to the top.

Look to the moon this weekend and be inspired by an achievement now 45 years old.  May you be so bold.
______________________________

Greg Hadubiak, MHSA, FACHE, CEC, PCC
TEC Canada Chair/Executive Coach/Senior Consultant
hadubiak@wmc.ca

Helping leaders realize their strengths and enabling organizations to achieve their potential through the application of my leadership experience and coaching skills. I act as a point of leverage for my clients. I AM their Force Multiplier.

The personal side of change management

I've done a lot of work in the area of change management.  This has been true on a one-on-one level as an executive coach, as a consultant working with a team or a business, and as a leader of various organizations over time.  I've been schooled on various models, best practices and pitfalls of change management.  In recent months, I've also found myself facilitating team sessions and running workshops around change management.  However, it wasn't until I read a blog post from another author that I gave much thought to the true personal impact of change despite the fact that I've worked through a pretty major change in my professional life in the past couple of years.

The blog post I recently read took a hypothetical look at the impact of change and crafted the story of an executive trying to explain to his young daughter why daddy was spending more time at home.  It was a nice work of fiction and covered off some of the questions that a child might ask of a father or mother in those circumstances - Why are you home so early?  What are you going to do now?  Does this mean that we won't go on vacation this year?  Will we still see our friends from work?

The post got me thinking about - and reflecting on - my own experience with the drastic change in career I took just over 2 years ago, what it meant to me at the time and since, and the power of that story to perhaps help others.  This latter point keeps coming home to me as I work with a variety of individuals and organizations as they initiate or react to change where we can overlook - quite consciously sometimes - the very real cost of change on a personal level.

In my case I saw the "writing on the wall" several months ahead of my eventual departure from my leadership role.  My organization undertook a long drawn out management restructuring that saw some leaders reappointed without competitive process while others were required to go through a selection process.  Early on I gave my direct reports the heads up that this was likely a convenient way to "reintroduce me to the marketplace".  Despite this foreshadowing on my part I continued to put forth best effort into my work and into the selection process as well.  However, coming to a reasoned assessment as to my ultimate fate did nothing to reduce my stress and anxiety during this time.  After all I had given a lot of my self into my organization in the preceding ten years and in many ways my role had become my identity. In actual fact, I had to deal with a string of sleepless nights leading up to my final interview with the assistance of a bottle of red wine.  As somebody who could be rightly called a teetotaler this was a helpful sleep aide.

I have to say that the actual "departure" event was relatively anti-climactic.  At some levels it was actually quite the relief to no longer live the charade of the past several months.  The surprise and shock was experienced more by my direct team than myself.  While I have not analyzed my "terminal event" through the lens of the Kubler-Ross model on death and dying, I probably did proceed through denial right off the bat if only manifested in a decision to take my family on a Disney cruise within a week of leaving my former executive role.  I'm still not sure how to truly assess that vacation time - was it an act of defiance, an act of reassurance for me, an act of reassurance for my family, or all of the above?

I've not had the same fictional experience of my daughters asking me why I might have been home more in the early days of my transition, or whether we were going to have a vacation or be able to buy them a new toy.  Rather it was me spending another string of sleepless nights trying to answer those types of questions for myself and trying to hold true to my own self-image as "man-of-the-house", professional and provider.  On and off over the past couple of years I've found myself having those same self-talks and striving with all my might to make sure that there is no impact to my family, their lifestyle and their goals.

I'll say that it's a lot to hold together and despite the best efforts of others - my wife in particular - it's a burden that I often still choose to shoulder alone.  I've not been able to completely answer all of my own questions over those past two years (e.g., where did some of my "friends" go?) but for the most part I've effectively dealt with the impact of organizational restructuring on my personal and professional life.  I remain anxious and carry the silent burden of trying to keep my family in the lifestyle they've become accustomed to.  I've remained committed to ensuring that my wife and daughters still get to experience all they can from life.  Overall, I believe I have held true to what's important to me as well as a leader and have translated that focus from a senior leadership role to one of business coach and consultant.

So what might be the power or lessons of this story for you in your leadership journey?  I hope there are at least two things that you might take away from this.  First, despite all the trials and tribulations we may be subjected to in our personal and professional lives, if we maintain our focus, effort and vision we can actually turn challenge into success.  So the sun does rise again.  Second, if you are initiating change, make effort to look beneath the project charters, timelines, and metrics to see the people being impacted by the change.  Recognize the extraordinary power you hold over their lives at that moment and into the future.  Recognize, appreciate and truly manage the personal side of change.
______________________________

Greg Hadubiak, MHSA, FACHE, CEC, PCC
TEC Canada Chair/Executive Coach/Senior Consultant
hadubiak@wmc.ca

Helping leaders realize their strengths and enabling organizations to achieve their potential through the application of my leadership experience and coaching skills. I act as a point of leverage for my clients. I AM their Force Multiplier.

Give your Willpower a fighting chance!

One of the things that I've really come to appreciate since starting up my coaching/consulting practice is the value of structure in my work - and personal - life.  It's not that I didn't have structure in my former executive role.  Lord no!  In fact, in my former executive world I was somewhat inundated with structures and other people who helped me with their own structure or imposed it on me!

However, as I have reinvented myself as an Executive Coach, TEC Canada Chair and consultant, I've had to become much more self-reliant on my own personal efforts.  I no longer have an admin assistant, an executive associate or a team to keep me on task.  I can no longer rely on others to remind me of upcoming meetings, set me up with briefs or notes from the past, or otherwise keep me progressing forward.  What I've also come to realize is that all my best intentions, willpower, and (fading) memory are "tools" that are inadequate to keep me on track and, more importantly, ahead of and on top of my timelines and goals.

What I've discovered is that many if not all of my clients suffer from a similar misplaced faith in the power of their own self-discipline and motivation.  It's clear that all of us suffer from some form of self-delusion in this regard.  We see ourselves as highly competent and motivated professionals, executives and leaders and, therefore, expect that we should be quite able to keep ourselves and our organizations on track through the sheer force of our indomitable will and strength of character.  When we fail to meet these high expectations for ourselves our level of frustration, anxiety, and even self-loathing is something to behold.  This is despite the fact that in many cases we have set ourselves up for failure.

But there is a way out of this trap and a way for us to actually better establish the basis for ongoing success in our lives.  It's all about structure.  And I'm not talking about overly complicated, burdensome and bureaucratic things that we might all dread.  It's about taking simple steps in our day-to-day lives that can give our willpower and good intentions a fighting chance to succeed.

So what kinds of things have I done to help me become successful and hopefully more successful into the future?  One of the first and best things I have done over the past 2 years is in fact create my own one page business plan.  That may sound intimidating to most of us and but I can tell you from personal experience that it helped focus my mind and efforts at the beginning of my journey and, more importantly, has served as a great touchstone to evaluate my ongoing efforts and success on a go-forward basis.  The key here is to SCHEDULE some time in your calendar to complete this task and then to review it on a regular basis - not less than every quarter.

Second, use the power of your electronic calendar and access that most of us have to personal digital assistants.  Given the number of clients that I have to personally navigate each week it is critical for me to not only establish my schedule of upcoming meetings in my calendar but also to set reminders a week or month in advance of critical dates and deliverables.  I try to ensure I am ready for each client encounter before it happens and if I tried to rely solely on my memory...well, I'd be out of business pretty quickly.

In similar fashion, I use my calendar and reminder functions to ensure that I do advance follow-ups with all of my clients once per week on a set schedule.  For me that has become Friday mornings, where I have set a time to connect with my clients, remind them of their commitments, and help them show up our meeting ready to work.  I have become part of their structural support network.  I also encourage them to follow-up with me - in particular as a result of coaching sessions - with their declared personal commitments immediately following our work together. 

For those of us with an ongoing support network - admin assistants, secretaries, executive associates - I also recommend enlisting those people as key supports.  If you lack structure, give permission to these staff to "impose" structure on you.  They are there to help you if you will only let them.  Often times you are much more desirous of being in creative and entrepreneurial mode while these people really do have a greater love for structure and order than you do.  Let them complement your best leadership qualities with what they know and do best.

I also personally use - and recommend to my clients - that they make use of some very ancient and useful tools at their disposal.  Sticky notes and paper.  Get things out of your head, on to paper, and visible to yourself on an ongoing basis.  As you create your personal business plan, get it out of your head and your computer hard drive, print it out, and paste it on your wall and in your line of sight.  Let it serve as a constant reminder of your personal and professional goals and objectives.  Let your visible and written plan guide your daily actions.  Similarly if you are having trouble overcoming a bad habit (e.g., checking your e-mail first thing when you come into the office, checking voice-mail) then put a bright colored sticky on your computer/phone to remind you to focus on your priorities first - what actions are going to help you move forward on your business plan objectives. 

We are all well-intentioned and capable professionals and leaders.  We would not have risen to our current status and roles if we were not.  But by applying a little more structure to our good intentions and willpower we can make that success easier to obtain and sustain.  We can give ourselves a fighting chance to become even better leaders.
______________________________

Greg Hadubiak, MHSA, FACHE, CEC, PCC
TEC Canada Chair/Executive Coach/Senior Consultant
hadubiak@wmc.ca

Helping leaders realize their strengths and enabling organizations to achieve their potential through the application of my leadership experience and coaching skills. I act as a point of leverage for my clients. I AM their Force Multiplier.